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luís soares

Blog do escritor Luís Soares

Warsan Shire - Backwards

                 for Saaid Shire
 
The poem can start with him walking backwards into a room.

He takes off his jacket and sits down for the rest of his life;

that’s how we bring Dad back.

I can make the blood run back up my nose, ants rushing into a hole.

We grow into smaller bodies, my breasts disappear,

your cheeks soften, teeth sink back into gums.

I can make us loved, just say the word.

Give them stumps for hands if even once they touched us without consent,

I can write the poem and make it disappear.

Step-Dad spits liquor back into glass,

Mum’s body rolls back up the stairs, the bone pops back into place,

maybe she keeps the baby.

Maybe we’re okay kid?

I’ll rewrite this whole life and this time there’ll be so much love,

you won’t be able to see beyond it.

 

You won’t be able to see beyond it,

I’ll rewrite this whole life and this time there’ll be so much love.

Maybe we’re okay kid,

maybe she keeps the baby.

Mum’s body rolls back up the stairs, the bone pops back into place,

Step-Dad spits liquor back into glass.

I can write the poem and make it disappear,

give them stumps for hands if even once they touched us without consent,

I can make us loved, just say the word.

Your cheeks soften, teeth sink back into gums

we grow into smaller bodies, my breasts disappear.

I can make the blood run back up my nose, ants rushing into a hole,

that’s how we bring Dad back.

He takes off his jacket and sits down for the rest of his life.

The poem can start with him walking backwards into a room.

Warsan Shire - The House

i

 

Mother says there are locked rooms inside all women; kitchen of lust,

bedroom of grief, bathroom of apathy.

Sometimes the men - they come with keys,

and sometimes, the men - they come with hammers.

 

ii

 

Nin soo joog laga waayo, soo jiifso aa laga helaa, 

I said Stop, I said No and he did not listen.

 

iii

 

Perhaps she has a plan, perhaps she takes him back to hers

only for him to wake up hours later in a bathtub full of ice,

with a dry mouth, looking down at his new, neat procedure.

 

iv

 

I point to my body and say Oh this old thing? No, I just slipped it on.

 

v

 

Are you going to eat that? I say to my mother, pointing to my father who is lying on the dining room table, his mouth stuffed with a red apple.

 

vi

 

The bigger my body is, the more locked rooms there are, the more men come with keys. Anwar didn’t push it all the way in, I still think about what he could have opened up inside of me. Basil came and hesitated at the door for three years. Johnny with the blue eyes came with a bag of tools he had used on other women: one hairpin, a bottle of bleach, a switchblade and a jar of Vaseline. Yusuf called out God’s name through the keyhole and no one answered. Some begged, some climbed the side of my body looking for a window, some said they were on their way and did not come.

 

vii

 

Show us on the doll where you were touched, they said.

I said I don’t look like a doll, I look like a house.

They said Show us on the house.

 

Like this: two fingers in the jam jar

Like this: an elbow in the bathwater

Like this: a hand in the drawer.

 

viii

 

I should tell you about my first love who found a trapdoor under my left breast nine years ago, fell in and hasn’t been seen since. Every

now and then I feel something crawling up my thigh. He should make himself known, I’d probably let him out. I hope he hasn’t

bumped in to the others, the missing boys from small towns, with pleasant mothers, who did bad things and got lost in the maze of

my hair. I treat them well enough, a slice of bread, if they’re lucky a piece of fruit. Except for Johnny with the blue eyes, who picked my locks and crawled in. Silly boy, chained to the basement of my fears, I play music to drown him out.

 

ix

 

Knock knock.

Who’s there?

No one.

 

x

 

At parties I point to my body and say This is where love comes to die. Welcome, come in, make yourself at home. Everyone laughs, they think I’m joking.